The Twerking of Paxus Calta-Star

You may know Paxus Calta-Star from his anti-nuclear activism and his  fervent promotion of the communities movement. You may even know a great deal about his romances and personal life from reading this actively updated blog.

However, there is a thing you do not know about Mr. Calta.

I suggest you sit down ladies, gentlemen, co’s and [please insert your preferred pronoun or title here]. The fact I am about to unveil may frighten or shock you, so even if you are the most unfazed radical faerie out there you may want to prepare yourself.

The truth has been kept a secret for sometime now, with the exception of those who pay attention to facebook carefully.

For those of you who do not follow such madness, I,  Miss Belladonna Took will give you the madness of Paxus Calta.

Paxus Calta-Star..

Twerks.

Paxus is a Twerk Fanatic

He’s a Miley Cyrus wannabe with a flair for letting it all hang-out.

If you’ve read his statuses lately you’ve see updates like:

“i be twerkin all night i be twerkin all day i be twerkin YAY”

“I will be giving twerking lessons at M* 5:30pm today till 7:00”

Apparently there are two masterminds behind Mr.Calta’s obsession with the most controversial dance craze of the season.

Was Miley Cyrus the inspiration for Paxus’s obsession?

I myself witnessed him twerk for nearly the entire “Thank You” party for the East Winders who have been working at Acorn for the past few weeks. They are going home tomorrow. Paxus could not seem to contain himself when he realized he had the chance to show off all his twerking skills to a room filled with dupstep-obsessed communards. He twerked all over anyone who give him a glance on the dance floor. He did manage to smoothly ask “Is it alright if I twerk on you?” to each person he used for his extensive twerk show. Luckily his twerking addiction has not caused him to forget the views he stands for. Towards the middle of the night he hollered at the topic of his lungs “Eat your heart out Miley Cyrus!” At this point most people were avoiding his requests for bodies to twerk upon. However a small group of highly intoxicated individuals were taking lessons from Pax and some were twerking on him!

Pax would even twerk on this statue if it gave him consent!

I watched from the sidelines, horrified by Paxus Calta-Star’s dance behavior. I felt very conflicted, I am all for people expressing themselves through any artistic niche they prefer. I feel it is my duty to accept Pax, twerking and all. Having said that, it is still difficult to watch. If I were forced to listen to Justin Bieber cover songs from the opera Carmen, it would be terrible, but not nearly as terrible as the sight that twerked before me. In this case, I could have left. I could have walked to the smoke shack to smoke away my discomfort. I felt guilt for my difficulty to remain open-minded. 

I honestly believe we must all try to accept Paxus, but sometimes there can be to much of a good thing. The behavior I have been seeing from my dear friend lately is quite frankly excessive worrisome. That was not first time he gave Twerking lessons either. I’ve lost track of how many times Paxus has stormed into Acorn’s new seed office in it’s busy season craze, excitedly requesting that people participate in a quick “Twerk Tip” as he calls his classes. Of course our young interns cannot resist and the office is filled with twerk frenzy instead of picking and packing seeds as it should be.

Paxus Calta-Star has a problem my friends. I say we have an emergency transparency meeting to help Paxus bring down his twerking it a healthy amount.

Concerned,

Agent Belladonna Took

The Best Dancer

Rabbit described it charitably by saying “Paxus dances like he is listening to a musical instrument which has not yet been invented.”  But i have to confess i was a bit terrified heading into our blues dancing adventure.  Feonix had contended that Blues Dancing and Yoga were powerful non-sexual intimacy building tools that we should include in the Loud Love conference we are organizing.  Ali (a new Oaker and part of the organizing team) was skeptical of the Blues Dancing part of this claim, so we needed to see it and experience it for ourselves.  After a 45 minute lesson, we jumped into the deep end of beginner Blues Dancing.

Blues dancing works well when the communication is free flowing. 

Feonix was right.  Blues Dancing, in contrast to many forms of dancing, requires a high level of consent consciousness to work.  The leader needs to send clear signals to the follower and they need to have a sensitivity to the followers comfort level.  I loved that the women asked me to dance and as poor as i was at the steps, i walked away feeling confident that our interaction was a positive one for them – despite my poor dancing.

At one point when i was dancing with Feonix i noticed a young woman who had her head against her partners chest and she had an incredible smile on her face.  I was appreciative of what i assumed was either a long trusting dance relationship or a romantic connection between this smiling dancer and her lead.  

Thirty minutes later this smiling dancer, Nina, would introduce herself to me.  We spoke of my developing theories on Blues Dancing and consent.  And like a good propagandist, Nina was quick to point out that there are problems with the consent culture in the DC area blues dancing scene.  Nothing especially serious, but people who were scaring away new dancers by being creepy around them.  Nina told me of partners who are sloppy in their signals and did things their followers did not want them to do.  But my mind had already linked onto the metaphor of blues dancing and advanced consent culture.  When i asked Nina about the partner who she was smiling so broadly on, she told me it was someone she had met one week earlier, but they had an extraordinary connection.    I was blown away, and further convinced.

When Steve later asked me who my favorite dance partner was, i had to say Nina.  Not because she was the most talented dancer (this was quite hard for me to tell), nor for her grace and attractive appearance.  For me Nina was the best dancer, because she shook me up.  She showed me her emotional daring both in asking me to dance and in dancing so close with a near stranger.

And daring is my favorite trait.

And i had a fantastic time and am convinced Blues Dancing should be part of the Loud Love conference we are organizing May 31-June 2 at Sophia House (more info and register here).